Family Tech Agreement: A One-Page Template Both Homes Can Follow

When your kids live in two homes, different screen rules can turn every evening into a negotiation. A short, written family tech agreement makes the rules clear, predictable and fair. Kids feel safer when they know what to expect, and you stop arguing about the same things every week.

Quick answer: keep it to one page. Write it with your kids for your home, covering where devices live at night, daily time, apps and accounts, online safety and one fair consequence. Then offer your co-parent a short shared safety minimum instead of asking for identical rules. Review it once a month.

Why a Tech Agreement Matters

Rules that live only in your head get renegotiated every night. Rules that are written down, agreed and posted on the fridge become “just how it works here.” An agreement also protects your relationship with your child: when a rule is broken, you point to the page instead of starting a fight.

It works best as part of a simple sequence: Agree on the rules, Set up the devices to match them, Talk about how it’s going each week, and Respond with one fair, predictable consequence.

The One-Page Template

Copy these headings onto one page and fill them in with your kids:

• Where devices live at night: phones, tablets and consoles charge in a shared space, not in bedrooms.
• Daily time: a recreational limit that fits each child’s age, a little more on weekends. Schoolwork doesn’t count.
• Screen-free times: meals, the hour before bed, and the first part of homework time.
• Apps and accounts: no new apps or accounts without a parent knowing; each app’s minimum age is respected.
• Privacy and contacts: private accounts, known contacts only, no meeting online friends in person.
• Safety promise: “If something online scares or upsets me, I tell a parent. I won’t be punished for telling.”
• Consequence: one clear step if a rule is broken, such as less entertainment time the next day.
• Review date: once a month, at a calm moment.
• Signatures: everyone signs, including you.

How to Write It Together

1. Pick a calm moment. A weekend breakfast, not right after an argument about a device.
2. Start with the why. “I want you to sleep well, get your work done and stay safe online.”
3. Let them propose first. Kids keep rules they helped write. Adjust their ideas rather than replacing them.
4. Agree on the consequence in advance. It feels fair when nobody is upset yet.
5. Set up the devices to match. Use the built-in parental controls openly, so the device enforces the rule instead of you.

Proposing It to Your Co-Parent

Different houses can have different rules. What matters most is a short shared safety minimum: devices out of bedrooms overnight, no secret accounts, known contacts only, and both parents informed about new apps. Send it as a proposal, in writing, without commentary. If the other home won’t agree, keep your home consistent; kids adapt to predictable routines.

For the bigger picture, read How to Set Screen Time Rules Across Two Homes Without Fighting.

Scripts That Work for Dads

• To your kids: “Let’s write our screen rules together, so nobody has to argue about them every night.”
• When a rule is broken: “We agreed on this. Tomorrow you’ll have less game time, like the page says. Let’s try again.”
• To your co-parent: “I’ve written a one-page tech plan for my home. Here are four safety basics I’d like us to share. Open to your edits.”

Tips for Making It Stick

• Post it where everyone sees it.
• Model it: your phone charges outside the bedroom too.
• Hold a 10-minute weekly check-in: what went well online this week, anything new, anything weird.
• Change the agreement only at the monthly review, not in the middle of an argument.

A fillable version of this agreement, with device setup guides, is part of Screens & Socials – Digital Peace System™.